I've Moved!

It just occurred to me to let everyone know I've moved by posting about it!. Well, there hasn't been anything new anyway. I've been staying up till all hours grading papers and sewing little aprons for my students. Yesterday was the last day of the school year, so I think I should be blogging again tomorrow, or at least by Monday night! Have a lovely weekend and come visit me at

Ashendreamer

I've started this new blog as a way of symbolizing a new focus in my life and I'm going to try to be more authentic, taking real pictures and using less magazine cover illustrations. I really don't know anything about photopraphy, so...well, I'll learn!

Checking the Inside

June 8, 2008 (My journal entry, which is perhaps not exegetically correct, but these were my thoughts at the time, and my conviction was renewed as I read them again today.)

Matthew 23:26 "Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean."

When my pastor quoted this verse in the context of actual clutter in his life, I thought, "Now, that's what I need to do!" The pharisees were focusing on what they looked like, lying to the world about where their hearts were at.

Unlike the pharisee, I am not lying. I will readily admit that my heart is dirty, full of self-indulgence and disorder, and my life reflects that. I don't have a clean house or feed myself and my husband properly, I don't make and keep appointments, etc. Everything is crazy and I am discouraged. Jesus wants me, warns me, to attend to the state of my heart before I try to tackle the mess of my outward life.

Lord, I know you love me and want me to leave this terrible cycle of discouragement and disorder behind. Please help me feed my spirit in prayer and in reading Your Word. Make me clean and strong on the inside.

5 Random Things

Here are 5 random things about me. If you haven't done this meme before consider yourself tagged!

1. I like to drink water out of a plastic cup. Glass feels awful. Everything else out of a mug. Preferably a red one.
2. I love everything Russian. And I'm not Russian.
3. When I was little my friend had a little Woodsey Log House that I loved and I still want one. Sooo bad!
4. My husband and I are both oldest children born in the same month of the same year.
5. I love having my own closet. And having the right to keep it as insanely messy as I want.

Trying again to be the person I want to be. Making dinner, setting the table, loving, thoughtful.

It's time for another Commitment to Loveliness! This is a fun way to increase femininity and beauty in our lives each week without even trying! All you have to do is choose five things that you would like to work on or do during the week that will increase the loveliness in your life!

Here is my list for this week:

1. Take a break to read Just Like Jesus every afternoon.
2. Continue with the No-S Diet (Yesterday I was a little sick, but I still mostly followed the plan!) I'm feeling better and prettier.
3. Wear a cross again to remind me of God all through the day. (I used to do this when I was struggling to stay focused on God. Having that cross there kept reminding me that God is with me.
4. Pray that God will help me to love people.
5. Wear my new makeup. I went to Wal-Mart and got a lovely, shimmery, rose lipstick ($1 and suprisingly moisturizing) and eyeshadow of a lighter corresponding shade. When I put on the eyeshadow, I feel like I'm wearing fairy dust! It has a very soft effect, but feels so pretty! I'm not usually a makeup girl, but I guess I'm going through a phase. :)

If you would like to participate, please visit Emma at Charming the Birds from the Trees. Actually visit her anyway, she has a very interesting and inspiring blog!

Sobered

It's not how much I can extract from life, it's who I can love.

Driving Home from College

respiro (2003)

wind huffing engine whirring leaning into curves past
towers over bridges going east traffic
like an ocean ever churning
kept me and Rosy
submerged
we held our breath
until the hills sank
and settled
and traffic
trickled
into the
endless
ricefields
glinting

wet

and

green

Is there something a little ironic about working out in your ice-cream-cone pj pants? And yes, on this, my first s-day, I did have one scoop of dutch chocolate walnut ice cream for breakfast. (Hopefully that is the worst of my weekend indiscretions!)

7 Quick Takes: 1

1. My lovely friend, Shadow, has started a blog. Come check her out at: http://shadowprvsthesunshine.blogspot.com/

2. I have been stopping for a coffee break every afternoon and reading Just Like Jesus by Max Lucado. Previously I have been taking a break by getting online and checking on things. That is not a break. That is an addiction. A break should be a time to feel peaceful, to lift you up. Pondering the heart of Jesus is a break.

3. This one hit home for me this week. After hearing it how many times?!

"Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking."

4. The no-s-diet is going well. It is a little confusing when your food is not on a plate, but it's not that hard to see if what's in front of you is excessive.

5. Moral of the story: (Heidi) Sometimes you don't get what you ask for right when you pray for it because God knows better. He has a plan, and if He did exactly as you wanted, you would not get what you truly wanted. Learning to let God lead...

Sometimes it's hard for me to accept that my prayers aren't going to be answered right away, especially when I feel like they are very good, holy requests. I'm not asking for an $80 bottle of nail polish. :)

6. My family had two birthdays surrounding Mother's Day. I was totally caught off-guard. I need to set up a birthday calendar!

7. The AUTOFOCUS method to beat procrastination has really been working for me this week. If you are a horrible procrastinator like me check it out! (Besides, then you can spend a little more time on the internet before you get back to work!)

If we are ever in doubt about what to do, it is a good rule to ask ourselves what we shall wish on the morrow that we had done. ~John Lubbock

The Long-Awaited

Jaena

I know it's disgusting, but if she was on the floor...I shudder to think. Please disregard background dishes.


Thrall victoriously attacking Jaena's dish after consuming all contents.

It's all I can do to keep her from leaping into Thralls welcoming jaws...or clawing inopportune keys on the keyboard. So glad she finally fell asleep!

No-S Diet update: Day 3, still keeping it up. I've been a little hungry today though. It is so simple to follow. And I'm focusing so much better when I'm not snacking all day long! I'm not recording weight loss data because it is natural to fluxuate 5 lbs or so as a woman. If I lose 10/fit back into my jeans I'll let you know!